Insomnia Cookies: Not Warm, Not Delicious, But Delivered

Annie Sinert and Mia Levine, Scarlet Staff

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In the very early hours of Friday September 20th, we were sitting in the third-floor lounge of Bullock hall when we got a sudden craving for something sweet, something crunchy, and something gooey in all the right spots. But what was open at such a late hour where we could fulfill our desire for sweets? After much vigorous deliberation, it hit us – Insomnia Cookies. Open and delivering warm cookies until 3:00 a.m., Insomnia seemed like our saving grace. 

We hastily downloaded the free app (available on the App Store and Google Play) onto one of our cell phones and placed the order almost instantly. At 12:22 a.m., we received a confirmation email that our order of half a dozen cookies and one cookie-frosting “big-wich” had been placed. The email clearly stated that our “order would be delivered as soon as possible,” and we were nearly jumping out of our skin with excitement.          

Half an hour went by and no cookies had been delivered. It was pure agony waiting for our delicious snack. We checked the app on our cell phone and it kept saying “error.” With confusion in our hearts, we decided to call the store and investigate where our cookies had gone. Oddly, instead of connecting us directly to the company’s Worcester location from which we had ordered, the automated call system connected us directly with a company representative. The representative asked for our name and the store from which we had ordered, and reassured us that our cookies were on the way and should be with us in twenty minutes. 

Twenty minutes went by, and still no cookies. We were nearing on desperation. The clock was ticking and we were ready to go to bed. We called the store again and were once again connected with another company representative instead of the actual store. They told us the same thing: the cookies were on the way and would be there in twenty minutes.

Another twenty minutes went by and much to our dismay, we still had no cookies. Bordering on hopelessness and low blood sugar, we decided to call the store one more time in an effort to track down our sugary treats. After a heated argument with yet another company representative, we were assured that the delivery person had left the store and would be there in, you guessed it, twenty minutes. 

At this point we were beyond hopeless. It had reached the time of the night that we felt such longing to crawl into our nice warm beds, wanting to just forget about the cookies. Suddenly, a beacon of hope! A ringing cell phone. The delivery person had arrived! We raced down the stairs and through the lobby, eager to confront the person carrying our warm snacks.

We were met by a light-hearted man who was incredibly apologetic about the delay. He mentioned that the store had given him several deliveries in one trip, each to a different college in Worcester. We thanked him and returned back to the third-floor lounge to consume the deliciousness waiting for us in the white and purple boxes.

We couldn’t wait. The website had promised us cookies that were “warm, delicious, and delivered” and at that point our mouths were watering. Much to our chagrin, the cookies were neither warm nor particularly delicious. Upon tasting the cookies, one student said that “it {the cookies} was kind of crunchy were it needed to be real gooey. And it’s also real dusty which I don’t like.” We were incredibly distressed. After paying $20.59 for “deliciousness,” we hadn’t received it. Another source concluded that it “was ‘mad’ overpriced for what we got.”

After further deliberation, we came to the conclusion that we should not blame the delivery person for our misfortune. We blame the company itself for overloading the poor worker who was just trying to do his job. Other individuals in our building told us that they have ordered from insomnia cookies before, with no issues and timely delivery. We sincerely hope that this was just a fluke and will not reoccur in the future. Do not let our one-time poor experience deter you and your friends from purchasing cookies. It may be worth your while. Unfortunately, in our case, it was not.